Shunned in High School 12/21/07

I hate waking up from a dream with that totally exhasperated feeling, like everything is wrong and the world is out to get you. And you can't tell if it's the present or the past or the future and then you just lay there and cry because of everything that you remember from the dream.

I sat here reading through some of my old dream posts because I know I've dreamt this before but I guess it must have been after the last entry I wrote here. Or maybe it was before I started blogging my dreams. I don't know.

I'm back in South Dakota and I'm in high school again and mom and dad are there but they're kind of just in the background and not really an active part of the dream. I don't really even want to go into that much detail but here's the short version of it.

Everyone I run across hates me. I've done something to piss them off or I'm just "stupid and a bitch" and they don't like me. Monica is pissed at me and won't even see me, Micki and her mom Tammy are like practically telling me I need to go commit suicide and Micki's about to leave. She's going somewhere I don't know where and she's like "After I leave, you should just drive off a bridge. It would save everybody else a lot of trouble. You're even hurting Mikayla." And I was like crying in frustration and I said to myself gawd Mikayla don't get yourself worked up because of a stupid snivelling little bitch.

And I like had made plans to go help out at the carnival and stuff, and even the people there were like go away, we don't need help from the likes of you. People just kind of stared and laughed and shit at me and I was running home. I got cornered by some asshole telling me that he was gonna rape me but I'm not worth his time.

I finally got home and mom has some little boy with her and he's helping her make pizzas and I was in the garage just trying to calm down and figure out what was going on, then Tasha shows up with her boyfriend Adam, and Mikayla. And Mikayla is even pissed at me and Adam's all gloating because he always hated me, even in r/l, and would do anything he could to make me upset or cry. So I start begging and pleading with Mikayla to tell me what's wrong and tell me what I did so I can make up for it and she's like.. "Don't get pissed over a stupid snivelling little bitch? How could you call Micki that?"

And Tasha like laughs maniacally and Adam's all stupid with glee and Mikayla just gets up and walks off and it's all because of Micki. Everybody in the whole gawd damn town is mad at me because of MICKI and there's nothing I can do to fix it. And the little boy my mom has helping her make pizzas is her new son and she doesn't need me anymore. He's all cute and adorable and sweet and helping her like a good little boy.

I woke up while I was running around sobbing and trying to find Dad to see if he could explain it to me. Laid there in bed and just cried for a bit because I remember feeling like that. Like everyone hated me and I couldn't do anything right. And people getting pissed at me because of Micki. Her turning people against me. Tasha turning people against me. All the time. And other people like Casey and I forget who else. Because I was smart or because I was fat or because I wasn't just falling in line with what they wanted to do and fawning over their supreme awesomeness.

The cat finally stopped me from crying. Zoot came over and started licking the tears away. I can't even go back to sleep now and it's been an hour and a half since I woke up. I don't know why I keep dreaming about Micki lately. It doesn't make any sense. I wish I had an answer so I knew what she wanted or what was going on and I could put a stop to this.

Fevered Dreams Update 12/16/06

So there have been a lot of extremely weird dreams in the past two days, while I've got the flu and a fever. Most I don't even remember now, but I figured I'd write down the ones I do. Joy for the flu and fevers.

--

The first one basically involves me being a guy. It's around Christmas time. I'm at a relative's house, it's about a week or so before Christmas I guess. I've got a little sister, she's around 14 or so. I'm about 25-26. I gave her one of her Christmas presents early and she basically is like... "Oh... that's..... nice........ thanks..." And I was kind of upset that she didn't like my present and my cousins or whatever were like laughing their asses off saying I'm a crappy big brother and she's a teenager now she doesn't want dolls and shit. And I was like dude.. no.. she's only 14. But.. I gave in, and got her like some makeup stuff and clothes and I figured fuck it if that's what she really wants then fine. But then I caught here with one of the neighbor boys fucking in the garage and I was like ohmygawd no, you're not getting makeup you're too irresponsible to wear that shit, you're just a kid and blah blah blah. I went off for like ever in the dream about it then finally woke up. Kind of bizarre and pointless.. whatever.


Then there was another dream before that, that I don't remember any details about, except that it involved a school.


Today... there was this one dream. I was with my dad.. and I had a baby. And we were with another family, but we were on the run from something. All stowed away in the back of this semi that Dad was driving. And we were going through Memphis. Right before we hit the old Memphis bridge, Dad swerved and hit this patch of mud and the semi went rolling tumbling crashing and we're like all shaken up. Get out of the semi and I'm sobbing because the baby is screaming and flailing and we have to keep running and other things happened but I don't remember now. I don't know what we were runnning from either.


After that was... I was being taken on a tour of this school. There were somewhat normal classes for the younger elementary students, but everything, every class is more directed towards a profession instead of general studies. There's one cafeteria for the normal younger students, then there's a separate cafeteria for the older "special" students. We were allowed to smoke down there. They ordered out for food, like pizza or Chinese, etc. So then I resume the touring of the classes, and I remember there's one class that's like for.. journalism or something. Creative writing, photography.. things you have to know to work on a newspaper. And then there's the music class.

The music teacher was this older guy.. he reminds me of the.. one actor, from the movie about the communist painter from Mexico. Frida was the movie, about Frida Kahlo and her husband Diego Rivera, played by Alfred Molina. And I'm not sure why that's important but I felt the need to write it down. At any rate, he's like teaching them how to set up a stage, and wire things, and tune guitars, and hook up the amps etc. And he like stops what he's doing and tells the class that I'm there for a demonstration. He basically bends me over, undresses me, puts me over this.. platform thing with one of the wedge cushions and fucks the hell out of me. Right there. And afterwards he's like grinding against me and stuff and nudging my ass with his cock and like.. I don't know, something came out and it was embarassing and he's like.. you didn't even make any noises and that just.. ok.. And he gives me a towel to clean up with, and he's explaining about.. this happens for this reason, and this is the result of that.. and it was like I was a demonstration on how to have sex. So then.. we both got dressed and I joined the class and we went back to learning.

It was so fucked up, gawd.


--


I hate having dreams like this, when I'm sick. Fevers result in such fucked up dreams.

Worst Dream Ever 7/20/06

I just woke up from the worst nightmare I've ever had. I had to take a shower. I don't know what brought it on or wtf it means and I don't know to know but I felt like I had to write it down so here goes. In part at least. I woke up with blood between my thighs, something's not right about that.

Was somewhere with mom and dad and I wasn't a kid but I was still under their command/authority and.. they were having like marital problems and barely talked and I had a Master somewhere and he had just died and I guess that's why I was back with them? Long story short... Dad made me have sex with him and I just did it I didn't complain or put up a fight I was actually enjoying it and he said a lot of stuff about mom had lost his interest and wasn't I just turning out to be a delectable woman.

I've gotta stop now but I think you get the drift. WTF OMG?? Going to go cry now.

Weird Fucking Dream 5/20/06

It started off with like... we were going around driving or something, it was me and a few kids, and fast food restaurants had just gotten some grant so that their food could be practically free.. just a few cents per meal.. ok.. that's kind of weird but then the dream shifted and....

There was this gorilla.. guy.. thing... that wanted to fuck me.. and like... it was supposed to show up in a few minutes and I'm bitching and sobbing and "please don't make me do this please don't, you can't make me" and trying to finish feeding my baby which... kind of looked like an alien/human hybrid.. and Jason practically tossed the baby on the floor and got up and rolled me over and slapped my ass then left and the gorilla thing came in and it was doing all this grunting hand signals half verbal communication and I was trying to make sure the baby was ok and it kept pulling me back down onto the bed and grabbing my ass squeezing roughly and shit and.. *shudders* It was just very very bad. I'm still sick to my stomach.

Hunting Dogs - Inbred DNA 5/18/06

So I waited too long before I sat down to write this but..

I was Wyatt in this dream I think.. I looked like Wyatt at least. Anyways. With this group of people and learning stuff and then somehow I got trapped by these... deformed... strange looking inbred people things.. and they like.... had their dogs, and they were trained to kill anyone that didn't share their blood line/dna. And so they were like tearing other people around me to shreds.. there were mangled and mutilated bodies all over... fingers torn off and lying around on the ground.. and the dogs like weren't touching me.. they'd sniff and then go off to eat somebody else.. and the inbred people were getting pissed off at me that I wasn't being killed.. and then one of them like... started screaming and hollering about I was related to them.. *sobs*

Other things happened before and after that, but that's all I can remember. It was like a damn B rated horror movie. All blood and guts and stupid cliche villain shit.

Fake Identity 3/30/06

I haven't had many dreams that I can remember lately that aren't smut related to Dean and Jared. Finally have something though and it looks like it's still centered around rp some.

I was about my real age and really thin, female, pretty.. and I was with this guy. I'm starting to think it was J but I don't know who, it might have been no one really. And he's like blonde, blue eyes, gorgeous looking. Smart, sarcastic, blah blah. So we're like dating and stuff and so much of this dream has faded now but we like had a bank account together and we were on a trip of some kind, driving, and we like needed another account for something.. some reason. And so like.. he has me get a new ID, and SSN etc. All new, all totally legit. I don't know how but they were all real. And so like.. we go in and we're applying for the account under my name and there were like these three women behind the counter all gushing and oh you're so adorable together sure we'll get you setup then I gave them my ID and one of them's like.. are you sure this is yours? You don't look like an Alexis.

And I like caught a glimpse of the ID and the name on it was Alexis Dupris (which is my latest char's name that I haven't even gotten to really play with yet). And I'm like whispering to the guy and his name was Jordan.. hmm.. ok so maybe it was Reyn? Or it's just nobody and those were the names my mind came up with. Anyways. So I'm like yes of course that's me and they like scan the barcode on the back of the ID and it's legit and shit and they're like still suspicious but they give us the account and we like.. get a hotel room there in that building..

And so we like are going through the lobby and there's a bunch of girls at a table that we've met up with on this trip and we go over and talk some and the guy leaves to go find something and I'm talking to them and like one grabs my purse to get something out of it and she sees my other ID and she's like.. so.. Alexis.. and I'm like what? And she shove the ID at me and she's like who's this? Who are you really? Alexis or .... and I can't remember the name. And I like.. try to come up with an answer and I can't so I leave and I get in the car and go and..

I'm driving and I think the dream changed some or something cause then all of the sudden I like.. drive down this back road and the car crashes and I get out and I'm shaken and groggy and stuff and then I'm like on his broken down warped old pier at the beach and this old guy comes up and he's like got this weird kind of wheel barrel and with no wheel and he drags it down the steps and it like clicks and thunks as the brackets hit the wood and then he like helps me get up and puts me in the wheel barrel and he like drags me back up the steps and starts to push/drag me back to his place and he's like.. talking and I can't remember what he said or what happened after that.

It was a.. weird dream.

Clay 2/12/06

It was another dream of Clay. I haven't dreamt about him in a while. Influenced I'm sure by the fact that I was aseep in the tub so it's kind of strange but..

I was taking a bath in the tub.. my adult self and mom was there fussing over me like I was still a kid and I was trying to convince her to just leave me alone. Just go away and let me soak. And the doorbell rings and she goes to get it and comes back and leads Clay in there. And it all seems perfectly normal. And so Clay strips down and gets in the tub and he's hugging up on me and tangling his fingers in my hair and whispering he missed me, and I was a bitch for leaving him. And I was just happy to be snuggled into him in the water. The tub just kind of grew to accomodate us I think. And so we're talking and catching up, and it's something about.. working and saving up money and helping people. And why hadn't I kept in touch? We were supposed to work together and we couldn't do what we were meant to apart..

And there was more to it than that.. but it's all fading. *sighs* I always feel so content dreaming about Clay. Then waking up is a bitch. Sad thing is I have no idea how to get hold of him anymore. I don't know where he's living to try 411, can't remember his mom's name to try that way, and I'm sure by now his grandmother's dead. Just have this urgent.. need.. to get hold of him. And I can't. *mumbles* Wonder what's up.

The Shop 2/11/06

I have no idea where I was but I was driving. My real self. And I saw this shop on a service road. And it looked familiar but I didn't know why. So I pulled over and went in and I was looking around and this guy comes out and he's like "I figured you'd be back. It's been a while." And I'm trying to figure out who this guy is and how he knows me, and if I'd been there before. And then for some reason I'm scrounging around for an excuse to be there.

It's a new age type shop. There are crystals all over the place, so many crystals. Books on tarot and wicca and aliens, books on runes, on everything. Incense, prisms, hand blown glass stuff. Silks and sarongs. And this guy is just staying quiet, waiting for me to say something or do something I guess. And I glance down at my hands and my carnelian ring is busted up. The band broke and the stone's crushed a bit. So I took it off and gave it to him and asked him if he could fix it. He looks it over and then he's like "Well.. let me see what I can find. You know what the stone means right?" Yeah yeah, I know what a carnelian is.

So he takes the stone out of the setting and throws the silver away and puts the stone on this display thing so he can look at it and he said something.. I can't remember what. And he said I should take it somewhere else to have it fixed. And we said a few other things then he's like why don't you come around the back and see the rest of the family. Ok.. this is getting weird but for some reason I do. And he asks me to go out the front and go around back.

So I take my carnelian and I go out front and I make my way around and it's this gorgeous lot with dogs running around and cats and there's a porch screened in. And I step up and go inside and he's talking to these older people seated around a round wooden table. They all stop when I come in. And he urges me forward and they're all smiling at me and stuff. And then I realize that I'd been there with Dad at some point. And so we go in the kitchen and he gives me a mug of tea to drink and says some stuff then asks me if I've given any thought to what I'm doing with my future.

I told him that I had no idea I was just waiting for Jason to get back from Iraq. And he said I should look into my touch therapy and taking some training classes for it. And reaches over and grabs my head as he says it, shaking me lightly then lets go. And I'm like.. I've thought about that.. my mother in law's sister is starting a reflexology massage spa type thing. And he says I should definitely do it.

And so like we talk a little bit more and he says something about I have to live up to my name and walk my path. And then I'm heading out and there's these three girls that are leaving or coming.. something. Neices I think. And they're going out the porch and the dogs are all barking and being a pain and the cats are swarming the porch exits and whenever the sunlight hits them they yowl and hiss and growl and smoke some and start to light on fire. And the guy's like damnit those damn dogs infected the cats and it was weird. So I like push one of the cats that are on the porch on the side I'm at the only one there and it goes out into the sun and explodes into flames. Then something woke me up.

Dream Police 2/11/05

Murr: would start to dream something about a field and a big farm house and then this guy would like filter in through the dream and say no you can't go there, try a different one and I'd wake up cause the cats did something else then would go back to sleep and it'd be the same thing
Reyn: ahh
Murr: finally fell asleep for good around... 11 or so I guess and dreamt about Dean and Sam instead except they were vampires I think and talking about how wrong it was on so many levels for them to be like that, never did anything except argue and bitch

I guess whatever was at the farm house someone was telling me I wasn't allowed to dream out there. Fuckers. Wonder what it was?

Vice Principal 1/4/06

Wow.. so it's been a while since I had anything substantial enough to put in here, and now I have this dream. Strange. It's kind of long, and there's a lot of detail it's gonna lose some in translation but I'm gonna try.

It started off strange. Mom was still alive. I'm female. We're like at the V.A. for her to get treatments or something. Things are more high tech in the dream than they are now. More technology. I'm like.. me as I am now I think, except not as young. I'm at least as old as I am now.

Walking out of the V.A. and trying to convince mom to just let me get the car there the quick way (which I have no idea how that is) and she keeps saying no no, and... run into Reyn. Almost literally. Jon and Joey are there too. Reyn's female. She was there for something, sick. I don't know if we knew each other before this or not in the dream but we kinda smiled at each other for a bit stupidly and mom's like.. she starts rambling going on about herself like usual and Reyn just kinda rolls her eyes and nods and tries to do the edge away run for safety thing. And details are fading here but mom winds up giving Reyn all her V.A. tickets for some kind of quick long distance travelling or something. And Reyn kinda watches me then leaves.

And I bitched and bitched at mom for doing that cause it meant that we had to walk home. Which we start to do.. and the dream kinda fades here I don't remember what happens between then and getting to the school.

Aaannnddd.. then I'm at the school. It's not like an elementary school or high school or anything it's just... a school. There are people there of all ages. Kids, adults, older adults.. I'm there, people I recognize from the past, a lot of people I don't. Reyn's there, Jon's there. And here I was friends with Jon, close friends. We're goofing off having fun and just being general pains, not getting school work done.. which I thik pretty much consisted of psi work. Which means it was back to another one of the schools for gifted people. I've had too many of these dreams. So anyways Reyn comes over and she bitches at Jon to do his work and then bitches at me for giving him an excuse not to, and I told her to relax and forget about it. That if he couldn't have fun while he's learning he'll never be able to do it, or remember it. And we started talking some more about other stuff.

Then.. like these competitions start up around school and there's all these really stupid things going on. Some normal stuff like cheerleading and sports, and other things are like.. who can levitate the ball the highest or who can fill up a room with the most energy, etc. And right in the middle of all the stuff going on, something huge hits the school. I think it was just an energy blast but we never found out in the dream. A lot of people are dying, a lot more are dead. And I'm like scrambling trying to find all the people I'm close to and the vice principal of the school is freaking out trying to get everyone to calm down and stop the mass hysteria so they can try and get things under control and she comes and finds me and takes me to the offices and makes me use an amplifier thing to soothe everyone, almost to like a zombie like state, that's how well it worked. People just stopped dead and kind of smiled and didn't do anything else.

And then.. I know Jon was still there, and some other people I knew but Reyn was gone. Not like dead gone just.. disappeared gone. And these people came and wanted to know what was going on, while I was still in the office. They didn't seem like the type of people you really wanna answer to.. if they were even people but the VP said that we'd been hit, and were trying to get the situation under control and they wanted to know who all was in charge here and she said that she was taking command, and putting me in second. *big jaw drop here* I tried arguing my way out of it and she refused and the people started roaming the school looking for.. something, I don't know.

And so a little bit of time passes a couple of days and we've got most of the dead and the wounded moved to where they need to be and we're trying to get everyone else out of there except we can't just leave we have to.. fly out of there. And I keep asking Jon where Reyn is and he's like I don't know I don't know but she's on her way back. And so.. they're trying to train everyone to do the things they need to in order for us to get out of there, and they've got me trying to learn how to remote pilot one of the carrier ships, and I'm still trying to talk my way out of it and not doing very well because more and more people are trying to come to me for my approval and advice, and I keep being sent back to the offices to use the amplifier to keep everyone calm.

And then Reyn shows back up, finally. She'd had to fly back there from somewhere else. Some people got transfered in the energy blast, somehow. And when she found out I was second in command she blew up and I tried to give her the position but nobody would let me so I'm helping her learn how to do everything anyways because I'm just not.. meant.. to be that kind of leader, and she's learning to pilot the ships and then another blast came and I heard the knock knock on yahoo.

Don't I know you? EMT 12/16/05 (Non Dream)

So it's official. I'm never leaving the house again. I'm used to getting lots of "Don't I know you?"'s but this is just starting to get too creepy. And too many all around the same time.

So I went to pay a couple bills, and I stopped in a gas station to get a pepsi. There's an EMT inside with his partner, at the register. One pays for his stuff and heads back out, the other is finishing up paying and turns, starts to go then stops and glances at me.

"Don't I know you?"
I dunno, it's possible. *smile*
"Yeah... yeah I do. You're Jade."
I'm... sorry I don't remember your name.
"Oh it's alright, I don't mean from here. I'm Randy though."
*gawd you're cute this is fucked up what the hell is going on here*
Oh.. you mean from the ah.. *nod*
"Yeah, from there. Nice meeting up with people here isn't it?"
Yeah, yeah it is.
*as his radio goes off and he grimaces*
"I've got to get back to work, but you take care."

What the hell is up with this lately?

The puzzle within a nightmare within a dream 12/16/05

Ok so in the dream I was like going to school and I was female.. and I'd been out a lot sick or something and people were asses blah blah. And I guess I had mono or something. So I was back and not really doing much just going around to my classes and this one teacher was having me do a role call and I was marking people that were there on a big white board with their pictures on it, painting X's over their faces with white out. It was kind of strange..

So I went home after school and crawled in bed, I had a brother and sister. We all slept in the same big bed. Went to sleep after a while and I thought the dream just shifted but.. it was like something that came out of a really bizarre creepy horror movie. There was this supreme evil thing in a house and it was affecting everybody in it.. my family. And they would get mean and get creepy and then they'd disappear like my parents did and then... I was asleep with my sisters, which was when I realized that in the dream in the dream I was male, and one of them rolled over and she started sinking through the bed into this acidy fleshy stuff and screaming and it swallowed her up whole through the bed. Ate her alive. And I was like screaming and trying to get her out and I couldn't save her and then I snatched my other sister off the bed and I woke up.

And.. as I woke up in the dream and started looking to see if my brother and sister were ok I woke up in r/l. Looked at the clock, thought fuck me that was strange I'm glad I woke up, and went back to sleep after a few minutes.. only to pick back up in the dream.

My sister was gone. We were having to try and deal with that. And I went to school, gawd knows why and everyone was staring at me like it was my fault and I'd had something to do with my sister disappearing. Lots of whispering and other bullshit.

Went home from school had to go through the woods to get there and it's like a typical horror movie scene. Creepy woods, light fading away, lots of wind and leaves whipping around all over the place and the urgent sense to hurry up and get the fuck out of there. So I get home and my parents aren't there just my brother and he's like "Something's not right we need to get out of here now."

Right.. so I like called someone.. someone paranormal that I thought might be able to help. And she told me that I had to go back into the dream and fix it, nothing else would work, we'd only get taken too. So I curl up in my brother's arms and try to go to sleep and he's petting me saying don't do it you're gonna get lost too. *sighs*

So.. I went back into the dream and I'm male again and I run through the house trying to find my sister so I can get her out of there and somewhere safe while I try to figure out what's going on and get my other sister and parents back and.. I look through the whole place and wind up in our bedroom downstairs and throw back the covers on the bed.. and then pulled the rest of the sheets off so it was down to mattress and in the middle where I slept was a normal patch of bed, and on both sides where my sisters slept was the acidy fleshy stuff that swallows them alive. And I'm like screaming in frustration and screaming at whoever's behind this to show themselves.

This dream was just too fucking strange. There was a dark voice that like thundered through the house and asked me what I was expecting to find. There wasn't anyone else there and there hadn't been for years. Didn't I remember that? I'd killed my family and been thrown in a psych ward for it and they had just let me out.

.......................

And I like start having flashbacks of killing my parents and my sisters and throwing all their bodies in the bed and throwing acid on them to try and make the bodies go away.

.......................

And so.. I woke up screaming.. Except when I woke up from the dream within the dream I woke up into my brother's body and the screaming was my sister because I'd just stabbed her and started trying to eviscerate her......... And then I woke up again and I was in the female body and I took the knife and stabbed it into my brother's throat and cut out his wind pipe and started sobbing.

And then I really did wake up again. And I went and took a shower to get the blood off my hand. Blood on my hand and a huge bruise on my arm that's faded some to a smaller bruise but it's still there. I wanna know what the fuck that was about and why I'm having nightmares like this again.

Ask a Question 12/12/05

Murr: I'm not sure if it was a dream dream or a complex dream but..
Murr: I was on duty in the monitoring station by myself and trying to stay awake cause the cats kept waking me up all morning and I was finally like ok I know you guys can hear me, I wanna ask a question and remember the answer to it
Murr: and so after a bit a voice finally said you're stubborn, you've asked this before but ask again
Murr: so I asked if I was male or female, and they said both.. was like ok..
Murr: both as in how?
Murr: and they said something along the lines of you were female and we needed another empath that already knew operations so we made a separate you and it was male, no more questions
Murr: and I sat the arguing to the silence that I still had more questions for like a half hour
Reyn: ahh
Reyn: yeah but...we already knew that
Murr: they wouldn't let me ask any other questions
Reyn: so ok..you sometimes go there as a female then?
Reyn: but the ones that's there is male
Reyn: was thinking you know
Murr: yeah
Reyn: they only pull the female you in when the other is unable to go for some reason
Murr: that's what I was thinking
Reyn: which would explain why there's two of you there sometimes
Murr: I was trying to ask if we were on atlantis or involved with it but they wouldn't let me verbalize that
Reyn: even if you could get better jobs and take care of yourself
Reyn: we take people from the star gates to complexes or colonies
Reyn: other clones and to villages and places where they need to go safely
Reyn: from the gates
Murr: yes
Reyn: or to the gates
Reyn: sometimes we only have a map to get there
Reyn: sometimes we have to find something on the way also if possible
Murr: was just trying to see if I could get a response on where everything is, or when
Reyn: does it really matter? it's all kind of the same bebe
Reyn: thats what I think anyway
Murr: well since I went to bed thinking about how to make it up to Ren, I dunno why it came up at all
Reyn: cause you've been wondering
Reyn: consciously and unconsciously

At the Mall (Non Dream) 12/10/05

Today has to be the strangest day I've ever had complex related. I couldn't sleep, no matter how hard I tried, and trust me I did try, for three hours. So I finally gave up and got out of bed and had this nagging sensation to go to the mall. No reason for me to go. There's nothing I wanted to buy and I hate the crowds and window shopping. Never the less the nagging sensation kept up so I gave into it and went. Looked around for a bit, wound up in the movie store and bought a couple dvd's then I headed out to the food court to get something to eat and then leave. This guy bumps into me.

I'd noticed him a few times while I was walking through the mall but hadn't really paid him any mind. Yet there he is, bumping into me non-apologetically and then just standing there watching me expectantly. So finally I gave in and spoke.

me: "Hi.. sorry."
"I'm not. So it is you then."
me: "Huh? Excuse me?"
"Oh you don't recognize me? Well, thanks for your help the other day anyways. Wouldn't have made it without you and your buddy."

ok whoa..... so it's complex related

me: "Oh, wow, ok sorry.. no I don't recognize you, but you're welcome."
"Nah, don't worry about it. Oh and by the way, I'd still do you."
me: "Huh?" *blush* "Well thanks..."
*huge grin on his part* "You blush here too, nice."
me: "So you like remember stuff from there? Did you wanna sit down and talk? Or do you have an email or yahoo I could get hold of you at?"
"You know it's against the rules, don't bother. I'm glad I ran into you though, I thought it was you when I saw you looking at the sci-fi movies. Have a good one, blusher."

And that was it. He walked off before I could convince him otherwise. Gawd and he was fucking hot too. Drowning pool eyes. How damn bizarre is that?? I wish I could have gotten him to sit down and talk or.. something anything. *mumbles*

Complex, Sore Throat 12/6/05

So.. I'm not sure what all was going on but I slept from 8-4 and woke up to Reyn's buzz... something on a mission had just slammed a sharp pointy object into the side of my neck, twisted, and jerked it free. I can barely swallow, keep coughing... I'm almost like expecting blood. Think we must have had a healer around I have no marks from it what so ever I checked.. I just still can hardly swallow.

I don't remember anything else from it.

Do I Look Like A Real Cop? 11/30/05

So I was like in Louisiana with my in-laws and J wasn't around.. and my brother in-law Jarod had gotten his driver's permit and he wanted to take me out to McDonald's to go eat.. so he convinced his mom that he wasn't hungry for pizza and dragged me out.. and he's driving his dad's truck and like runs a red light getting there and he has an antenna or something setup for his mom's cell phone in her suv and she's behind us driving?

So we got there and there's like this huge kind of.... fun obstacle course or something setup.. and you have to go through it to get into the building? So we go up and we're like talking and catching up and stuff and you have to climb up this huge swinging catwalk thing that gets progessively higher up and there's like all these girls complaining about it and we just kept going.

Finally get inside and we start eating and everything and then my dad shows up and says he needs my help for something so I told Jarod to stay put and I'd come back for him. Go with Dad.. he has to pick up something from a party at the Circle (the bar he goes to up in SD) and I wind up having to play bartender for a bit while he talks to people.. and someone asked me if I was pregnant and that was when I realized that I was female.. and.. yup.. pregnant.. wtf? So I'm like yeah and she starts gushing saying how great I look and I shouldn't be working and dad finishes up and I go with him and he has me drive... and it's his damn beat up Willis pickup truck.. so we're driving and I'm like killing my arms trying to get the steering wheel to turn and all..

And Dad looks over at me and he's like calling someone on his cell and he says "Do I look like a real cop when I'm calling you?" was like... ok wtf is this.. "Yeah.. well at least you do it with confidence and that's what makes a difference.." and then Reyn came on and I woke up.

There was more to it than that, but it's all faded now. I remember something vaguely from the complex where I had refused to do the experiment but I don't remember any specifics.. strange ass night.. not sure what all that was about.

Khalara, Complex, and.. More Searching 11/28/05

So it started off the same way they're all starting lately.. think I seriously need some release. Dream switched to Khalara then.. with Charlie helping Alex in his office, and the Morrigan appeared out of nowhere with a prophecy.. I can't remember the words. I dunno what started Khalara again.. but was like checking up on how everyone was.. lots of women either were pregnant or had their babies already and the Duils and Jolie were perfecting their combining/attack thing.. I dunno. Anyways.. Switched to the complex for a while. More of the I can't believe you agreed to do the experiment you have to change your mind I won't let you do it, you're on my team, I'm your team leader I get a say in this so you AREN'T doing it.. more pushing and shoving and fighting and make up. Woke up briefly from that and went back to sleep.. it was.. I was in Memphis or somwhere, it looked familiar.. and I was tagging along with this group of four people. Doing research for something.. some archaeological dig or treasure hunt.. like usual, lately. Anyways we... were at a restaurant discussing what our next move was, and this guy shows up and says.. "I know you don't trust me, but you're just going to have to because I know where the obelisks are." So.. we argued over that a bit then had him sit down and we started making plans to go find the obelisk which was out in Samaria (present day.. Jordan) and then another one was in the Gobi Desert. The obelisks had keys to something else we had to find, then the keystones get put into the obelisks and.. something happens, I dunno what. Too much of it has faded now. *sighs*

Car Chase 11/28/05

Murr: started off dreaming about charlie and bryan, then it sequed into charlie and tyler then it was charlie and chris then the cat knocked something over and went back to sleep and started this strange dream about driving around santa monica or somethin with J, following you, you were leading us somewhere
Murr: and we turned down a side street and ran into a fence and the engine killed and flooded and wouldn't start again and J was bitching at me about it being my fault
Reyn: ahh
Murr: and you called and started laughing about you knew I couldn't keep up and I told you what happened and you're like shit I'll turn around
Murr: and J kept bitching and got out of the car and went to talk to the lady that owned the house and came back and started to bitch at me again and the fucker called and woke me up

Basketball? switched to Complex 11/27/05

I was female.. and hanging out with a bunch of girls, and we were like in school or something. And there are all these rulles and regulations and restrictions about the things you're allowed to do, or when you can do them, and you have to follow them or you'll be killed or corporal punishment or something.. anyways. So I'm dating this guy and he's a basketball player and we just want to have sex and make out and we keep trying to sneak off to do it except they keep calling him to come play so he has to go or it's back to the death/punishment thing. So he goes and plays and I go and bitch to the girls I was hanging out with.. and one of them says "you were so much easier to get along with when you were a guy"
..............
........................
Ok so then something woke me up right after.

Got back to sleep. Dream changed to... I was back to being my usual dream self and in the complex and we just got back from a mission and were debriefing then winding down and went and found Reyn and he was telling me that he can't believe I'd even consider going through with their experiment and doing the sex change and we started arguing about that heatedly.. to the point of shoving and hitting and then it just.. went elsewhere from that. *coughs* So... yeah.


Sex change???????

Murr: I have no fucking clue where that came from
Murr: some experimental thing they were doing to see if it heightened abilities

Atlantis RP 11/27/05

Ok so chars wet dreams are messed up, and.. so when you start speaking to yourself in your dreams in riddles, about roleplay, you know there's something seriously wrong. Was dreaming about Charlie dreaming about Atlantis. He mumbled some stuff to himself when he woke up:

the key lies within

for memories untold, look within
your mind expands, and soon draws thin
take not from the past, for it's long since gone
the answers you seek can be found in the dawn


Anyways.. so there it is. Found a couple Atlantean fonts earlier too, will do something with it and pass it on. I think it's nonsense, because it doesn't really mean much no triggers, but it goes with the rp thing with Alysa so I'll just leave it at that.

Clay and Dai's Submissives 11/25/05

Murr: first dream started out as I was in Memphis and a girl and my best friend Clay's mom was getting remarried to this guy but the guy was like a demon or a.. something not good and so I was trying to convince Clay not to let his mom get married, then Clay figured out what the guy was and confronted him and went missing and so I spent the rest of the dream trying to find a way to vanquish the guy and he kept trying to kill me and it was a lot of running around and like huge storms and floods and I finally got the asshole dead and Clay came back and I woke up........

Murr: then... went back to sleep and I was driving down to dai's house *mumbles* and I get there and the girls run out to see me at the car except they're like all older and there's a bunch of other teenage girls living there that they're like training to be submissives, and I was bitching and arguing at dai and ken for having kids in the house involved in bdsm and this 16 yo girl starts hitting on me calling me mistress wanting to serve me and I kept like trying to disuade her from it and she kept trying to force herself on me and be all seductive and there were all these pregnant cats running around..

Murr: I would so like a normal dream for once lately... just one regular dream
Reyn: lmao
Reyn: well you know the last one would be a fairly good premonition
Reyn: cause no offense but they're headed that way
Murr: I know
Murr: except dai and ken are getting divorced, and I don't plan on ever going down there again, ever
Reyn: never know

Cereal Prize 11/22/05

Murr: you and me in the kitchen and I was eating cereal but I was digging through the box trying to get to the prize
Murr: going I know they put it in here, I know they did
Reyn: lmao
Murr: and you were telling me that's stupid no one would be dumb enough to put it in a cereal box
Reyn: we agrue alot in your dreams or go back and forth
Murr: and I pulled out this little... carved gold square that was slightly raised on one side like a pyramid had a smoky gem on it that was swirling with like some sort of mist or something inside
Murr: yeah we do
Murr: it's bad
Murr: but we always
Murr: not like we don't sit here and argue anyways ;p
Murr: anyways so I like shoved it at you and said ha!
Reyn: lmao
Murr: and you were mumbling and I started laughing and called someone to let them know and went back to eating my cereal
Reyn: you need to write that down
Reyn: well you know don't think we're on escourt duty anymore
Reyn: we're looking for stuff
Murr: I was trying to remember all the others I had between waking up
Murr: I've been looking for things for a while now
Murr: the house in the swamp dream?
Murr: the box
Murr: all the houses
Murr: I'm always looking for something
Murr: and it's always pyramid like or ancient and has to do with the stars
Reyn: yeah last dream I had of escourting was walking beside the river in the rain and mud
Murr: yeah
Reyn: I'm looking at stuff

iPod? Not sure.. 11/21/05

Had a weird dream and I can't remember any of it now. Something to do with... we were looking for something and there were images of it stored on an iPod Shuffle and someone had a tiny little screen with an adapter for it that you hook up to view the files and everyone kept saying give it to him to see, let him look at it.. so they shoved it at me and I was looking through the files going omg that's just.. wow they have that too.. omfg I thought this was lost..

I can't remember now what the items were! Fuckin a... ah well. It was something, as usual, to do with astronomy related items, or ancient archaeological tools, etc etc. Things you'd expect to find in something like Stargate. Little sun dials that line up with planets to show a map or.. well, you get the idea.

So it's back to this. The same stuff as from the dream about the box. I think it's probably the same time frame, the same reality. I just don't know if it's an alternate reality/dimension, or it's a future life. Either way, it keeps coming up. I know whatever the things are we're looking for, they're extremely important to the cause. 'The Cause' ..... 'The Bigger Picture' ...... I think this has something to do with the Indigo Children, and with.. things coming to an end/new beginning.

I just wish I could remember more. It's 1:36 now. 30 minutes to write this little bit??? Grrrrrr....

Humming Sound 11/20/05 (Non Dream)

Alright, so this wasn't actually a dream, it was something that happened today, but I felt like I needed to write it down anyways. Log taken from talking to Reyn, I'll elaborate more.

---

Murr: so besides the fact that my bathroom felt like a meat locker...
Murr: you know that strange humming pulsing throbbing sound movies associate with ufo's or other strange things?
Reyn: yes
Murr: heard that in the bathroom while I was freezing my ass off and so.. out of curiosity because I've turned into a dumb blonde from a horror movie
Murr: I went outside
Reyn: lmao
Murr: no birds chirping, no sounds of cars just the humming sound
Murr: then it stopped and all the regular ambience kicked in
Reyn: you're a dumbass
Murr: I know
Murr: I started whimpering like an idiot had to come check the time make sure I didn't fall for a trap gawd
Murr: not that it matters

---

Soo.. yeah. I hadn't lost any time. I'd been gone a total of seven minutes from when I went brb to when I sat back down. Between going to the bathroom then going outside that's how long it would have taken. And I know that doesn't mean anything, but something about that just was so.. not.. right. Not in the least bit. The sound sent chills down my spine and I couldn't help but go outside to check and see. Haven't had anything like this happen in a long long time. I'm gonna call Dad about it. Have a pounding headache now too.

---

Edit: 7:35pm - I called and talked to Dad.. he didn't sound himself, not sure what's up, and I couldn't get him to talk for long. So I told him what happened. He asked me about time loss. Nothing new there, same old drill. He said it was probably an electro-magnet field. Also nothing new there. Guess I was expecting more from Dad.. some reassurance or insight. *sighs* Oh well. Time to watch Charmed now that it's frickin 7:52. Gonna take a quick nap after that.. and hopefully Reyn will be on and the headache will be gone.

Mass updates

Well let's see... since the last dream I remembered in detail there hasn't been much that I really do remember. I have had a few dreams about Shaun the last week, they started up out of the blue, and I went back and read some logs and the dreams just keep happening, except it goes from Shaun to Chris and back and forth and.. it's confusing but ah well. Just dreams.

Other than that... nothing. Tiny tidbits of complex happenings but it's nothing new, just the same old sitting around playing cards, or talking watching movies, nothing about missions.

I still can't write though. This has taken me forever to try and get out.

Trying To Get Home 11/11/05

So besides the fact that today is a double digit.. 11/11, the dream I had a bit ago before I woke up was kind of strange.

I was back in Memphis and not with friends of family, at least not people that I knew from the past to be. Something happened and then.. I wanted to go home, so I had someone drive me except by the time we got over to Knight Arnold and Mendenhall I forgot what street you had to turn on to get to Cristil. I could not, for the life of me, remember. I keept passing Newberry where my school was on and saying no no you went too far, turn around, and we'd get back to Knight Arnold and it was too far again. The constant back and forth and turning down streets, lost while looking for that one fucking street to turn down. I even tried going down Knight Arnold to turn down the other street to get to Cristil, but of course as soon as we did, I forgot that street name too.

Well, just for reference since I looked it up:

Mendenhall to Scottsdale
Scottsdale to Cristil
or
Knight Arnold to Dothan
Dothan to Cristil

That was one of the most aggrivating dreams I've ever had in my life. I should have known that, living there for eleven years. And everytime I got close something made me forget. I have the feeling that it was a "red herring" dream so to speak just to keep me distracted from something else. And... since I know Reyn is still asleep because I can feel the pull, going back to bed now.

A Few Past Dreams

So here are a few of my dreams from the past. I'll just put them in one post for now, and add the others when I can find them.


The Gnarled Woman 9-14-05

there was a path through the woods, marked off with knotches and symbols on the trees and I was having to follow it deeper and deeper in.. cold misty woods, and the ground slowly started sloping down more and more into a valley, and then I just went sliding and falling through the trees because there was a sudden drop off

whenever I finally hit flat ground again was in some kind of a shallow canyon, with a cabin there.. smoke coming out of a chimney, could see a fire inside through a window.. made my way over.. slowly got up the courage to knock and the door did that eerie just kind of creak open thing

there was an old woman inside... gnarled, wrinkled.. doubled over with age.. she had... one of the most.. hideous, frightening faces I've ever seen.. and she told me to come in and shut the door, because I was letting all her warmth out.. so I went in with that I'm gonna die here, full of dread sense and she pointed to a chair with this long twisted finger

so I sat... and she got me a bowl of some kind of broth and made me drink it... then came over and cupped my chin and stared at me for a while.. then she told me a whole bunch of things

and I can't remember a single one, was just things that were going to happen that I needed to prepare for, and things that I needed to know about so that I could stop them

that woman just downright fuckin freaked me out.. like I shouldn't have been there, shouldn't be listening, shouldn't be touching the broth... can't remember anything past her starting to talk, except I know it didn't end there

(I had a follow up dream to this, where I went back to see the gnarled woman to find out what I had before since I couldn't remember, and she told me that if I came to see her again there would be severe repricussions and this was the last time she would tell me. I still can't remember.)



The Box 9-23-05

was a student in some kind of school for exceptional students.... it wasn't a regular school, it was for people who were gifted somehow but I don't remember how

throughout the entire dream no matter how it varied I was on some sort of schedule, had to find something had to get things at a certain time of day or specific time, no matter what

there was a guy that was sort of in charge of the school I guess and he was so.. negative.. evil.. he was an asshole.. there was a girl that charmed my best friend into marrying him in the middle of school so I'm like driving them off to get married protesting saying no you can't do this it's wrong she tricked you come on baby you don't wanna do this and I swerve and ram into something and he gets knocked out of it and the charm wears off he takes off to go home and get away from her before it starts again.. take the girl back to the school and the guy in charge... like the principal.. has us escorted into the building to his office and I'm saying he's gonna kill you for this you're in so much trouble and we sit and wait and he shows up and then I'm the one that's getting my ass chewed and she's all smug like I knew what I was doing I was supposed to do it and he sends her off and then I'm arguing with him about how that's bullshit and wrong and he can't get away with it someone will find out.. he like starts to escort me out of the building himself with his hand on my jaw telling me how no one will even know I'm missing no one will remember, and it was such a loss because I had potential but I just can't see the bigger picture.. and I like bite his finger, bite down hard enough to try and break it or sever it and he finally lets go then I run for it..

a lot of stuff happened between the beginning and end and I can't remember it all.. Reyn was the best friend I saved.. um.. there were other people I recognized, we got together on this.. save the end of the world or be guardians against something team and we worked towards protecting people from the apocalypse or other people like us that had special gifts/abilities.. and this part is just all sort of muddled into a lapse..

the end of the dream I went into this really really old place.. like way old.. and I had to climb up.. was climbing up through like this old.. walled in section or something, pulling myself up from one wooden beam to the next, and I kept checking at certain points feeling for something behind the boards against the wall.. and I finally found it, pulled it out and had to secure myself so I wouldn't fall then opened it.. it was an old, old old box.. dark wood and black.. the top was sort of inlaid on it.. slid into a groove the whole way across to shut it and when it was closed you couldn't tell how it even opened..

on the back of the lid when you flipped it over it looked like it was meant to be an egyptian artwork to sit on a table or something was black with gold embossing and it was basically this mountain scene with an eclipsed sun over it, and dark, dead things were coming up the mountain, like zombies or mummies, things that weren't alive and things that would.. bring about the end of existence or something

inside the box was another puzzle piece, the entire quest to find this had been nothing but a huge puzzle piece, and like always there was a piece missing, things slid into place and locked and there was some kind of herb or root inside it that you had to eat and something else, but there was a small little piece missing off the corner like it had broken off so you couldn't finish the incantation that was on the thing to invoke or jump start whatever it was that was supposed to happen when you did it..

so I closed the box back up and put it under my shirt tucked into my pants and instead of climbing back down, I kept going up.. was like climbing up an old chimney or ventilation shaft or something except it was all stone/brick and it had been boarded up at some point so there were the wooden beams dispersed along the inside.. and I finally stopped near the top and pushed a board aside instinctively and crawled out into a small like attic room, and on the mantle on the far side of the room was the piece that was missing from the box thing.. went and grabbed that stuck it in my jeans and then took the stairs down.. go figure, couldn't take the stairs up but there were stairs down

get out let someone know that I had the box and then low and behold Jason like shows up out of no where.. hasn't been in any of the rest of the dream, except I can tell it isn't Jason.. and he shouldn't be in the dream.. he didn't fit.. and his mom is with him and he's like did you get it? let me see it? and he looks at it and he's in awe about me finding it and he wants to go ahead and do the invocation now like *right* then and there and I'm getting a worse and worse feeling about it and he goes off to get us something to eat with the stuff inside the box that you have to eat and his mom's like waiting with me and I'm showing her the stuff and trying to explain to her what the language is and what the end result is and she turns the lid on the box over and looks at it and goes.. hmm.. well you realize if you do this that you'll unleash all these things on the people that you were supposed to save.. this doesn't do the good you thought it would do

and so Jason comes back and I'm struggling trying to decide whether to do the invocation or go put the box back where I got it and throw the broken off piece away and he's trying to urge me to go ahead and do it and when I finally tell him I won't he's all dejected then he's like ok.. well.. you can head home.. so I get ready to go and I still have the box with me for some reason and I start to drive home and Jason calls me and like wants me to do the invocation over the phone with him while I'm driving and I protested for a long time then gave in and started it and that's when I woke up

Welcome Home 11/6/05

So.. this one is about you know who coming back. Reyn was offline but somehow I was close enough to go over to your house and skulk around depressed outside, hands shoved in my pockets kicking at the ground, upset that you were offline and stuff.

There was a welcome home party going on and you had a bunch of family over celebrating, and everybody was inside watching a movie. And I sat down against something and knocked over like the trash can or something.. and you sent Joey outside to see what it was so he drags me in and says we have a burglar and like pushes me into the room and I'm looking all apologetic cause I so know I sohuldn't be there and it's only going to cause problems. So you know who looks at me and just mutters something about I stick my nose into everything else so I might as well stay and Joey like kinda pushes me some more then goes and sits back down and you just give me this pitiful look like I'm glad to see you but why'd you have to do it so I sit down in a chair outside the room and slide down in it some stretching my legs out and lay my head against the wall glancing into the room at you some.

You watch me for a while then roll your eyes and get up and drag me back into the room and like pull me into a recliner with you to sit and watch the rest of the movie and all the family that's there like stares at me disapprovingly and after a while they all start leaving shaking their heads at me and not saying anything. Joey keeps giving me dirty looks like I shouldn't be there and I'm fucking things up then Jon and Kate come out and like hug me and start chattering away while everyone's leaving and you kinda grin and try to hide it and I get up and go into the kitchen to talk to the two for a bit. Everyone clears out except you and the grumpy ass and the kids and I convince Jon that I'm still gonna be there in the morning so he should go back to bed and we can talk then. So.. I go back into the room you're watching the movie in and start to sit in a different chair and you pull me back into the recliner and whisper that you're glad I came because you were losing your mind and we just snuggle into each other and watch the last of the movie.. and one of the cats pounced me as the grumpy ass was getting up to say something so I dunno what happened after that.

Play the Part 11/5/05

I was female in this one.. I wasn't married to this guy but I looked just like his wife and they were fighting and he was rich. And his wife wasn't around for whatever reason and someone saw me in the hotel he was staying in and assumed I was her and like dragged me off made me get all dressed up and did my hair and makeup said go and just get this over with then you can go back to pretending to be someone else and I'm thinking what the fuck.. so I go and meet the guy and we have to have this big dinner then some movie premiere or something I dunno.. anyways I wind up spending all night talking to the guy and getting to know him and falling in love with him like an idiot, and he's like.. thinking he's falling in love with his wife again and he's really happy about it..

Then the alarm went off and I hit snooze (omfg I hit snooze on an alarm? what's wrong with this picture) and tried to get back to the dream but I couldn't and I wound up in a partial recovery dream.. started out in the complex snuggled up to Reyn telling him I don't care what he calls me because it doesn't matter it's just a name and I'm just me anyways and... led to other things from there, then it merged into just hard, pounding sex except I wound up female again.

I think it's all Reyn's fault with the talk last night we had. ;p

Fight 11/1/05

Um.. Reyn and I were living near each other in Louisiana. Reyn's J was an ass. My J wasn't around. Jon and Kate were being themselves and hanging around asking lots of questions and being pains but it was nice.

We had been sitting around for a few hours talking, and.. I said something about how next life, we should try to just bypass everyone else and just be together, because after all these years of obviously not getting to be with each other first it'd be nice..

Reyn went off on me and told me to stop my wishful thinking and just get over the fact that I wasn't important enough to come first so I could just come around towards the end like always and fix all the mistakes and be dropped as soon as they were.

And so.. Reyn left, the kids and J went with and.. even in the complex there was like.. no emotion no interaction, nothing anymore it was just gone. And I got so pissed off about it and was selfish enough to not do my job there and Reyn wound up getting attacked and died.

And.. whenever I woke up I tried calling for a long time, in the dream. No answer for a few days.. and when I finally did get through you didn't even know me at all.



I have no idea where this came from or why, but I can't handle another one like this.

Deactivate 10/29/05

I was dreaming something about a farm, or a place set out at the country at least but it wasn't flowing right. Scenes kept skipping and jerking like a film reel that wasn't put in place right and then I heard a whispered "Deactivate" in my ear and I woke up.

Concentration Camp 10/26/05

This dream.. either switched over from or merged from Reyn's visit.. and I was younger again in my teens and dad and mom come and pick me up from somewhere and we're driving and then we're back in Memphis all of the sudden and stopping by to see an old friend and somewhere from there we wound up in the like huge hotel and in the pool and people are stripping down to their bras and underwear and stuff and getting in and then things just start getting crazy and some guy gets zipped up in a huge duffle bag and tossed in the pool and he starts drowning and somebody lifted him up out of the water with telekinesis and someone else started healing him and I'm like no no no stop they know they're coming because they feel it and..

Everyone started getting dragged off to rooms and locked up strapped down and tested and stuff and they provoke everyone to make them show what their abilities are and it just got really.. really bad. They started sending people off to different places to be used for what they wanted and I wound up at the complex.. wasn't the desert one but it was one out in maybe New York? Montauk/Camp Hero? Not sure.. but I was there and then other people I knew started filtering in and we tried to break out and couldn't and we tried to just not respond to them and it didn't work so we.. just went with it and they started training people and sending them off on missions.

The experimenting testing period in the dream was just.. too vivid. I don't wanna write it all. IV's and shots and different reactors put into us and it burned and people screamed and some died during the testing because of things they put them through. It was just bad.

Reyn's Visit 10/26/05

you=Reyn

It's easier to just write this like I was telling Reyn so that's what I'll do.


Some other things happened at the beginning of the dream that I can't remember but you like went offline for a couple days with no word, and then you showed up on my front porch kncking. And you like shoved your hands in your pockets and tried to look apologetic. "I just had to get away and.. Jon wouldn't shut up he insisted we come here so here we are." I'm not sure where I was living but it wasn't NC might have been LA. So Kate's like in the background all giggling and shy unsure(*) then she like comes up and hugs me and starts babbling away and won't shut up and I drag you all inside and make coffee and Jon steals a pack of my smokes and starts asking me all these questions.

(*) wasn't like shy shy was like.. I don't know if I want to be here and you're that strange person that's always on the phone but.. oh hey I guess I can do this *instant latch on*

Finally get the kids to go look through my dvd's and books and ask why you showed up and you refuse to tell me will only say I'm just here for a while and that's all I'm gonna say. Ok, no problem, fine with me. I'll take you however I can get you. So we get Jon and Kate setup in a room and then we talk for a while more and I help you bring the bags in and stuff and set up your computer and then we go and get groceries and stuff and we're like laughing a lot having a great time. Was really really nice.

Then... Jason like shows up out of nowhere and he throws a fit because you're there and I hadn't said anything and I told him to get lost and he was still bitching at me, being nice to you and the kids but yelling at me.. then totally out of nowhere Dad shows up and.. Jason shuts up and he's ok with it and he goes back to wherever he was. Dad sticks around for a bit and talks to you and me about the complex and about ghosts, and he starts telling you about all the things he's experienced and dreamt in the past. Then he has to go because he's gotta get back on the road so he leaves and it's just me and you and Jon and Kate again.

Went to sleep at some point in the dream snuggled up to you and was a nice hot hard complex dream and went back to being awake and we talked a lot more and I wound up saying something that pissed you off and you like left without Jon and Kate and went... somewhere I dunno and so I was talking to Jon about his abilities and trying to help him sort through that some more and Kate was dancing in the background talking and giggling and stuff and you finally showed up again at like 3 in the morning with your hands shoved in your pockets again.. and I just let you in and we didn't say anything and curled up and watched a movie then went to sleep and everything was fine..

Then at some point the dream switched over to something else.

House on the Moor 10/24/05

Dreamt about a big moor and the mist rolling over it in the dark... riding over a bridge on horse back.. and getting to this big keep/manor place and the owner trying to usher me inside quickly.. wasn't a servant or anything was the guy that owned the house... and then I found out I was supposed to be doing a clearing on the house to get a ghost or some creature out of it and was walking through.. all these hundreds and hundreds of rooms trying to cleanse them and something grabbed me and I woke up.

House 10/22/05

Hmm.. ok so there was a house, and it was haunted. Kind of.. chilling, creepy.. strange things but it wasn't like.. completely supernatural happenings. It wasn't shriek worthy scary. And that's about all I remember. That.. and.. Reyn had a dream about a haunted house too.

I would think that it had something to do with the fact that I was reading about the Amityville house before I went to sleep but then Reyn had a house dream so.. I'm not sure. I remember something about a woman showing me the house and doing the tour of the rooms thing.. and there were people in the rooms that were kind of.. half there half not. I can't remember any more. It all faded.