Saturday, December 16, 2006

Fevered Dreams Update 12/16/06

So there have been a lot of extremely weird dreams in the past two days, while I've got the flu and a fever. Most I don't even remember now, but I figured I'd write down the ones I do. Joy for the flu and fevers.

--

The first one basically involves me being a guy. It's around Christmas time. I'm at a relative's house, it's about a week or so before Christmas I guess. I've got a little sister, she's around 14 or so. I'm about 25-26. I gave her one of her Christmas presents early and she basically is like... "Oh... that's..... nice........ thanks..." And I was kind of upset that she didn't like my present and my cousins or whatever were like laughing their asses off saying I'm a crappy big brother and she's a teenager now she doesn't want dolls and shit. And I was like dude.. no.. she's only 14. But.. I gave in, and got her like some makeup stuff and clothes and I figured fuck it if that's what she really wants then fine. But then I caught here with one of the neighbor boys fucking in the garage and I was like ohmygawd no, you're not getting makeup you're too irresponsible to wear that shit, you're just a kid and blah blah blah. I went off for like ever in the dream about it then finally woke up. Kind of bizarre and pointless.. whatever.


Then there was another dream before that, that I don't remember any details about, except that it involved a school.


Today... there was this one dream. I was with my dad.. and I had a baby. And we were with another family, but we were on the run from something. All stowed away in the back of this semi that Dad was driving. And we were going through Memphis. Right before we hit the old Memphis bridge, Dad swerved and hit this patch of mud and the semi went rolling tumbling crashing and we're like all shaken up. Get out of the semi and I'm sobbing because the baby is screaming and flailing and we have to keep running and other things happened but I don't remember now. I don't know what we were runnning from either.


After that was... I was being taken on a tour of this school. There were somewhat normal classes for the younger elementary students, but everything, every class is more directed towards a profession instead of general studies. There's one cafeteria for the normal younger students, then there's a separate cafeteria for the older "special" students. We were allowed to smoke down there. They ordered out for food, like pizza or Chinese, etc. So then I resume the touring of the classes, and I remember there's one class that's like for.. journalism or something. Creative writing, photography.. things you have to know to work on a newspaper. And then there's the music class.

The music teacher was this older guy.. he reminds me of the.. one actor, from the movie about the communist painter from Mexico. Frida was the movie, about Frida Kahlo and her husband Diego Rivera, played by Alfred Molina. And I'm not sure why that's important but I felt the need to write it down. At any rate, he's like teaching them how to set up a stage, and wire things, and tune guitars, and hook up the amps etc. And he like stops what he's doing and tells the class that I'm there for a demonstration. He basically bends me over, undresses me, puts me over this.. platform thing with one of the wedge cushions and fucks the hell out of me. Right there. And afterwards he's like grinding against me and stuff and nudging my ass with his cock and like.. I don't know, something came out and it was embarassing and he's like.. you didn't even make any noises and that just.. ok.. And he gives me a towel to clean up with, and he's explaining about.. this happens for this reason, and this is the result of that.. and it was like I was a demonstration on how to have sex. So then.. we both got dressed and I joined the class and we went back to learning.

It was so fucked up, gawd.


--


I hate having dreams like this, when I'm sick. Fevers result in such fucked up dreams.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Worst Dream Ever 7/20/06

I just woke up from the worst nightmare I've ever had. I had to take a shower. I don't know what brought it on or wtf it means and I don't know to know but I felt like I had to write it down so here goes. In part at least. I woke up with blood between my thighs, something's not right about that.

Was somewhere with mom and dad and I wasn't a kid but I was still under their command/authority and.. they were having like marital problems and barely talked and I had a Master somewhere and he had just died and I guess that's why I was back with them? Long story short... Dad made me have sex with him and I just did it I didn't complain or put up a fight I was actually enjoying it and he said a lot of stuff about mom had lost his interest and wasn't I just turning out to be a delectable woman.

I've gotta stop now but I think you get the drift. WTF OMG?? Going to go cry now.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Weird Fucking Dream 5/20/06

It started off with like... we were going around driving or something, it was me and a few kids, and fast food restaurants had just gotten some grant so that their food could be practically free.. just a few cents per meal.. ok.. that's kind of weird but then the dream shifted and....

There was this gorilla.. guy.. thing... that wanted to fuck me.. and like... it was supposed to show up in a few minutes and I'm bitching and sobbing and "please don't make me do this please don't, you can't make me" and trying to finish feeding my baby which... kind of looked like an alien/human hybrid.. and Jason practically tossed the baby on the floor and got up and rolled me over and slapped my ass then left and the gorilla thing came in and it was doing all this grunting hand signals half verbal communication and I was trying to make sure the baby was ok and it kept pulling me back down onto the bed and grabbing my ass squeezing roughly and shit and.. *shudders* It was just very very bad. I'm still sick to my stomach.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Hunting Dogs - Inbred DNA 5/18/06

So I waited too long before I sat down to write this but..

I was Wyatt in this dream I think.. I looked like Wyatt at least. Anyways. With this group of people and learning stuff and then somehow I got trapped by these... deformed... strange looking inbred people things.. and they like.... had their dogs, and they were trained to kill anyone that didn't share their blood line/dna. And so they were like tearing other people around me to shreds.. there were mangled and mutilated bodies all over... fingers torn off and lying around on the ground.. and the dogs like weren't touching me.. they'd sniff and then go off to eat somebody else.. and the inbred people were getting pissed off at me that I wasn't being killed.. and then one of them like... started screaming and hollering about I was related to them.. *sobs*

Other things happened before and after that, but that's all I can remember. It was like a damn B rated horror movie. All blood and guts and stupid cliche villain shit.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Fake Identity 3/30/06

I haven't had many dreams that I can remember lately that aren't smut related to Dean and Jared. Finally have something though and it looks like it's still centered around rp some.

I was about my real age and really thin, female, pretty.. and I was with this guy. I'm starting to think it was J but I don't know who, it might have been no one really. And he's like blonde, blue eyes, gorgeous looking. Smart, sarcastic, blah blah. So we're like dating and stuff and so much of this dream has faded now but we like had a bank account together and we were on a trip of some kind, driving, and we like needed another account for something.. some reason. And so like.. he has me get a new ID, and SSN etc. All new, all totally legit. I don't know how but they were all real. And so like.. we go in and we're applying for the account under my name and there were like these three women behind the counter all gushing and oh you're so adorable together sure we'll get you setup then I gave them my ID and one of them's like.. are you sure this is yours? You don't look like an Alexis.

And I like caught a glimpse of the ID and the name on it was Alexis Dupris (which is my latest char's name that I haven't even gotten to really play with yet). And I'm like whispering to the guy and his name was Jordan.. hmm.. ok so maybe it was Reyn? Or it's just nobody and those were the names my mind came up with. Anyways. So I'm like yes of course that's me and they like scan the barcode on the back of the ID and it's legit and shit and they're like still suspicious but they give us the account and we like.. get a hotel room there in that building..

And so we like are going through the lobby and there's a bunch of girls at a table that we've met up with on this trip and we go over and talk some and the guy leaves to go find something and I'm talking to them and like one grabs my purse to get something out of it and she sees my other ID and she's like.. so.. Alexis.. and I'm like what? And she shove the ID at me and she's like who's this? Who are you really? Alexis or .... and I can't remember the name. And I like.. try to come up with an answer and I can't so I leave and I get in the car and go and..

I'm driving and I think the dream changed some or something cause then all of the sudden I like.. drive down this back road and the car crashes and I get out and I'm shaken and groggy and stuff and then I'm like on his broken down warped old pier at the beach and this old guy comes up and he's like got this weird kind of wheel barrel and with no wheel and he drags it down the steps and it like clicks and thunks as the brackets hit the wood and then he like helps me get up and puts me in the wheel barrel and he like drags me back up the steps and starts to push/drag me back to his place and he's like.. talking and I can't remember what he said or what happened after that.

It was a.. weird dream.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Clay 2/12/06

It was another dream of Clay. I haven't dreamt about him in a while. Influenced I'm sure by the fact that I was aseep in the tub so it's kind of strange but..

I was taking a bath in the tub.. my adult self and mom was there fussing over me like I was still a kid and I was trying to convince her to just leave me alone. Just go away and let me soak. And the doorbell rings and she goes to get it and comes back and leads Clay in there. And it all seems perfectly normal. And so Clay strips down and gets in the tub and he's hugging up on me and tangling his fingers in my hair and whispering he missed me, and I was a bitch for leaving him. And I was just happy to be snuggled into him in the water. The tub just kind of grew to accomodate us I think. And so we're talking and catching up, and it's something about.. working and saving up money and helping people. And why hadn't I kept in touch? We were supposed to work together and we couldn't do what we were meant to apart..

And there was more to it than that.. but it's all fading. *sighs* I always feel so content dreaming about Clay. Then waking up is a bitch. Sad thing is I have no idea how to get hold of him anymore. I don't know where he's living to try 411, can't remember his mom's name to try that way, and I'm sure by now his grandmother's dead. Just have this urgent.. need.. to get hold of him. And I can't. *mumbles* Wonder what's up.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

The Shop 2/11/06

I have no idea where I was but I was driving. My real self. And I saw this shop on a service road. And it looked familiar but I didn't know why. So I pulled over and went in and I was looking around and this guy comes out and he's like "I figured you'd be back. It's been a while." And I'm trying to figure out who this guy is and how he knows me, and if I'd been there before. And then for some reason I'm scrounging around for an excuse to be there.

It's a new age type shop. There are crystals all over the place, so many crystals. Books on tarot and wicca and aliens, books on runes, on everything. Incense, prisms, hand blown glass stuff. Silks and sarongs. And this guy is just staying quiet, waiting for me to say something or do something I guess. And I glance down at my hands and my carnelian ring is busted up. The band broke and the stone's crushed a bit. So I took it off and gave it to him and asked him if he could fix it. He looks it over and then he's like "Well.. let me see what I can find. You know what the stone means right?" Yeah yeah, I know what a carnelian is.

So he takes the stone out of the setting and throws the silver away and puts the stone on this display thing so he can look at it and he said something.. I can't remember what. And he said I should take it somewhere else to have it fixed. And we said a few other things then he's like why don't you come around the back and see the rest of the family. Ok.. this is getting weird but for some reason I do. And he asks me to go out the front and go around back.

So I take my carnelian and I go out front and I make my way around and it's this gorgeous lot with dogs running around and cats and there's a porch screened in. And I step up and go inside and he's talking to these older people seated around a round wooden table. They all stop when I come in. And he urges me forward and they're all smiling at me and stuff. And then I realize that I'd been there with Dad at some point. And so we go in the kitchen and he gives me a mug of tea to drink and says some stuff then asks me if I've given any thought to what I'm doing with my future.

I told him that I had no idea I was just waiting for Jason to get back from Iraq. And he said I should look into my touch therapy and taking some training classes for it. And reaches over and grabs my head as he says it, shaking me lightly then lets go. And I'm like.. I've thought about that.. my mother in law's sister is starting a reflexology massage spa type thing. And he says I should definitely do it.

And so like we talk a little bit more and he says something about I have to live up to my name and walk my path. And then I'm heading out and there's these three girls that are leaving or coming.. something. Neices I think. And they're going out the porch and the dogs are all barking and being a pain and the cats are swarming the porch exits and whenever the sunlight hits them they yowl and hiss and growl and smoke some and start to light on fire. And the guy's like damnit those damn dogs infected the cats and it was weird. So I like push one of the cats that are on the porch on the side I'm at the only one there and it goes out into the sun and explodes into flames. Then something woke me up.

Dream Police 2/11/05

Murr: would start to dream something about a field and a big farm house and then this guy would like filter in through the dream and say no you can't go there, try a different one and I'd wake up cause the cats did something else then would go back to sleep and it'd be the same thing
Reyn: ahh
Murr: finally fell asleep for good around... 11 or so I guess and dreamt about Dean and Sam instead except they were vampires I think and talking about how wrong it was on so many levels for them to be like that, never did anything except argue and bitch

I guess whatever was at the farm house someone was telling me I wasn't allowed to dream out there. Fuckers. Wonder what it was?

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Vice Principal 1/4/06

Wow.. so it's been a while since I had anything substantial enough to put in here, and now I have this dream. Strange. It's kind of long, and there's a lot of detail it's gonna lose some in translation but I'm gonna try.

It started off strange. Mom was still alive. I'm female. We're like at the V.A. for her to get treatments or something. Things are more high tech in the dream than they are now. More technology. I'm like.. me as I am now I think, except not as young. I'm at least as old as I am now.

Walking out of the V.A. and trying to convince mom to just let me get the car there the quick way (which I have no idea how that is) and she keeps saying no no, and... run into Reyn. Almost literally. Jon and Joey are there too. Reyn's female. She was there for something, sick. I don't know if we knew each other before this or not in the dream but we kinda smiled at each other for a bit stupidly and mom's like.. she starts rambling going on about herself like usual and Reyn just kinda rolls her eyes and nods and tries to do the edge away run for safety thing. And details are fading here but mom winds up giving Reyn all her V.A. tickets for some kind of quick long distance travelling or something. And Reyn kinda watches me then leaves.

And I bitched and bitched at mom for doing that cause it meant that we had to walk home. Which we start to do.. and the dream kinda fades here I don't remember what happens between then and getting to the school.

Aaannnddd.. then I'm at the school. It's not like an elementary school or high school or anything it's just... a school. There are people there of all ages. Kids, adults, older adults.. I'm there, people I recognize from the past, a lot of people I don't. Reyn's there, Jon's there. And here I was friends with Jon, close friends. We're goofing off having fun and just being general pains, not getting school work done.. which I thik pretty much consisted of psi work. Which means it was back to another one of the schools for gifted people. I've had too many of these dreams. So anyways Reyn comes over and she bitches at Jon to do his work and then bitches at me for giving him an excuse not to, and I told her to relax and forget about it. That if he couldn't have fun while he's learning he'll never be able to do it, or remember it. And we started talking some more about other stuff.

Then.. like these competitions start up around school and there's all these really stupid things going on. Some normal stuff like cheerleading and sports, and other things are like.. who can levitate the ball the highest or who can fill up a room with the most energy, etc. And right in the middle of all the stuff going on, something huge hits the school. I think it was just an energy blast but we never found out in the dream. A lot of people are dying, a lot more are dead. And I'm like scrambling trying to find all the people I'm close to and the vice principal of the school is freaking out trying to get everyone to calm down and stop the mass hysteria so they can try and get things under control and she comes and finds me and takes me to the offices and makes me use an amplifier thing to soothe everyone, almost to like a zombie like state, that's how well it worked. People just stopped dead and kind of smiled and didn't do anything else.

And then.. I know Jon was still there, and some other people I knew but Reyn was gone. Not like dead gone just.. disappeared gone. And these people came and wanted to know what was going on, while I was still in the office. They didn't seem like the type of people you really wanna answer to.. if they were even people but the VP said that we'd been hit, and were trying to get the situation under control and they wanted to know who all was in charge here and she said that she was taking command, and putting me in second. *big jaw drop here* I tried arguing my way out of it and she refused and the people started roaming the school looking for.. something, I don't know.

And so a little bit of time passes a couple of days and we've got most of the dead and the wounded moved to where they need to be and we're trying to get everyone else out of there except we can't just leave we have to.. fly out of there. And I keep asking Jon where Reyn is and he's like I don't know I don't know but she's on her way back. And so.. they're trying to train everyone to do the things they need to in order for us to get out of there, and they've got me trying to learn how to remote pilot one of the carrier ships, and I'm still trying to talk my way out of it and not doing very well because more and more people are trying to come to me for my approval and advice, and I keep being sent back to the offices to use the amplifier to keep everyone calm.

And then Reyn shows back up, finally. She'd had to fly back there from somewhere else. Some people got transfered in the energy blast, somehow. And when she found out I was second in command she blew up and I tried to give her the position but nobody would let me so I'm helping her learn how to do everything anyways because I'm just not.. meant.. to be that kind of leader, and she's learning to pilot the ships and then another blast came and I heard the knock knock on yahoo.